Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it. -Winston Churchill
Open Marriage....does it work?
After reading Monique's admission to having an open marriage it got me to thinking. Could I have an open marriage, and does it work? In Hollywood it's more common, but if you ask the average man or woman most will say no, or Hell No! When I was in my twenties I would have been one of those hell no's myself, but now that I'm in my thirties I have a different outlook on life and relationships. I'm not condoning cheating in any way, shape, or form. I'm just more open minded now.
Monique on husband and open marriage:
"Could Sid have sex outside of his marriage with me? Yes. That's not a deal-breaker," she says. "That's not something that would make us say, 'Pack your things and let's end the marriage."
Most marriages end due to money problems or cheating. So the question I ask is, does an open relationship cure the cheating bug? If you and your partner are in love but you want to taste someone else's cookies, is swinging or an open relationship the way to go? I asked a few of my friends and I was surprised at some of the responses.
One couple that's been together for four years said they've been to the strip clubs together and they've even had a few threesomes. Their rule is they can only be with someone else if their partner is physically present, no creeping. Another couple that's been together for ten years says they have both been unfaithful, and it was devistating to the the relationship. Cheating caused them to separate for six months, and they almost divorced. He now has a daughter from the other woman. They've reconciled and agreed that cheating or swinging is definitely not for them. The third couple has only been together for a year, their newlyweds. He wants to try a threesome but she's leery. Her concern is what if he enjoys the other woman more, and why is she not enough?
That's a good question. Why do some people seek affection, attention, or sex outside of their relationship? Is it greed? boredom? A male friend of mine says it's a need for variety.
He says his woman can be the most beautiful woman, she can be freaky, sexy, she can cook and clean. He will love her to death, but he will still want to be with other women. Not because he doesn't love her, but because he needs variety when it comes to sex.
That may be a hard pill for some to swallow but I believe that's what it is. You know some people have a hard time handling the truth, but I believe that's why most people cheat, especially men.
Now I don't know if I could be as open as Monique. She said her hubby could have multiple relationships and she's okay with it. I'm not judging, to each it's own. I will say it's a thin line. Allowing a third party into your relationship could cause insecurities, jealousy, and problems in the relationship, BUT on the other hand being closed minded and saying you can not be with another person at all can also cause cheating, creeping, and problems in the relationship. I believe communication is the key, and the difference between an open relationship and cheating. Talk to your mate, and be open to compromise, you never know you might like it!
I personally wouldn't want my mate to be with someone else, but if they had an itch I believe I could help them scratch it. Maybe we'd go on a trip out of town and have some extra special fun together. Never say never because the minute you do, you'll find yourself doing it!
Vid: Rihanna "Rude Boy"
One of my fav songs right now!
"Come here rude boy, boy can you get it up. Come here rude boy, boy is you big enough."
A Dose of Wisdom
-Dr Seuss
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